Happy Birthday to Me

Today is October 12th, and yesterday was my birthday. Getting old isn't as bad as painful joints, wrinkles on my face, neck and body and not being able to see (or hear) like I once did. Birthdays can be a time to reflect and see where we are headed as well as where we have been. To hell and back is where I have been...so now, where am I going. I have not made a 5 year plan for a long time, as I don't know WHERE it IS I want to go! I want to go and visit my (X) brother in law in Germany. I want to travel. I want to have a man friend to travel with, go to a movies with and laugh and even cry a bit with. I want to write my book, for Katherine. (and hopefully get published). I want to get a JOB and get some MONEY. I want to be able to actually SPEAK Spanish...not just kinda understand it. I would like to be able to forgive myself for getting married so young, and not waiting to choose someone who would be mature enough to be a husband and father. (are there such men??) I want to forgive my X husband for not being the guy I thought he was. I want to forgive my parents for not being the loving, supportive, parents I really needed. These people are who they are, and being hurt and angry only hurts me.

So for the next year, this is what I will do: Work for 1/2 hr a day on my book (at least). Every day forgive the people who have hurt me, until it stickes. Talk to my brother in law and see if he will let me come and visit in a few years. Look for a job to make some money. Not just a nursing job, but any job. Smile and meet some new people, maybe even a guy.

The First Blog

Well, this is the first Blog I have ever written in my life! But I was born in the time of news papers and News at 6! We had three channels on our TV. All black and white and fuzzy. The first TV I remember having was a 9" viewing screen and the rest of the TV was a wooden cabinet standing about 3 feet high by 2 feet wide! My Mom regularly yelled at me for sitting too close to the TV, but what else was I to do? How else would I be able to see Mighty Mouse or The Road Runner cartoons? We were poor but we lived in a nice condo type apartment. Two bedrooms and bathroom upstairs, and living room, kitchen and a small laundry room downstairs. I had to share a bedroom with my brother, Michael, who is 2 years older. I was about 10 at this time, in the 4th grade at St. Mary's Catholic School, in a class of 50 kids. There were maybe 20 kids that we played with from the other apartments in our complex and play we did! ALL DAY LONG! There was a ravine in the back of the complex where we played war! I was always a nurse, so I guess it was no surprise when I became one as an adult. We would all swing on the swings and sing at the top of our lungs until it got dark and the neighbors complained and we were made to finally go inside. It was 1964-65, and a lot was happening. President Kennedy was shot and killed in Dallas, Tx. I made my confermation at St. Mary's and my brother was just starting his business. Michael would walk to the Stop N Shop and buy candy and then come back to the complex and sell to the other kids it for a little profit. He also was able to buy cigaretts for my mother with a note from her. I wouldn't let my kids do half the things we did and certainly NOT my granddaughter!! We walked to stores and school. We played outside ALL day and didn't have money for cookies or pop and candy. No wonder I was called "Bobby Pin" by my brother when I was in first grade.

This blog will be about my life. It was full of humor; black humor and odd humor. I hope some people can relate or learn, but mostly enjoy reading about my life.